Handout C-2: Developmental Stage

I. First possible explanation: Developmental stage

Each developmental stage has predictable behavior that accompanies it. The behavior is the child's way of Practicing the important tasks of that stage. Just as a child practices tasks in physical development, such as standing and walking, until he becomes proficient, he must practice (over and over) behaviors that serve to rehearse developmental gains in the cognitive, emotional, and social spheres. These behaviors can be frustrating for caregivers, but they are a necessary part of human development.

II. Clues: How can I tell if a behavior is explained by a child's developmental stage?

· This behavior is described in child development books.
· I have seen other children at the same stage behave this way.
· I remember doing it myself when I was a child.

III. If a behavior is explained by a child's developmental stage, what action should I take?

Actions to be taken in the following order:

• Remember that all children do this and that this child must do it too. The behavior will end as the stage passes. Try to relax.
• Tolerate the behavior. It is developmentally significant and serves a purpose. Think about what the child is accomplishing with the behavior.
• Allow the behavior in certain places at certain times. This is called channeling. Find ways for the child to accomplish the developmental task that will not be as difficult for caregivers. This is not distraction or substitution.
• Stop behavior when it is disruptive or a danger to others or self but remember behavior will return. Stop the behavior in ways that don't make the child feel bad about himself for doing something developmentally necessary.

IV. Examples

· Joaquin:

Elizabeth is about to tear her hair out. She is very frustrated that nine-month-old Joaquin keeps throwing things off the high chair. Spoons, bowls full of cereal, carrots-all go over the edge. Joaquin giggles with delight when Elizabeth picks them up and puts them back on the high chair tray.

After taking a break and asking her partner to supervise Joaquin's lunch for a few minutes, she can take a deep breath and think about what is going on. She knows that every child this age at the Head Start Infant-Toddler Program goes through this maddening stage. She remembers the Infant Specialist's in-service training last month talking about what babies do to learn that things don't disappear forever when they can't see them anymore (object permanence). Babies need to practice having things disappear and reappear.

Elizabeth knows that this is a really important lesson: Joaquin needs to know that Mama and Papa come back when they go away to work in the morning and that his special Elizabeth doesn't disappear forever when she leaves the room for her break. Remembering that Joaquin needs to do this helps Elizabeth relax and not get quite so frustrated. She also knows that if he has other ways to practice this task he might do it less in his high chair.

That afternoon she plays peek-a-boo with Joaquin a lot and lets him find his rattle hidden under a blanket over and over again. At late afternoon snack, he doesn't throw his banana!

· Brittany:

Four-year-old Brittany is loud. She has a lot to say, and usually she says it at the top of her lungs. Her mother Deborah is getting very tired of it and is telling Imani, the Head Start home visitor, about how she just needs a little peace and quiet!

Imani understands-she remembers her two boys and how loud they were at the same age. She also reminds Deborah that, together with Brittany's teachers, Deborah has been helping Brittany remember to use words instead of actions like shoving or kicking when Brittany is frustrated. Brittany is doing a great job with that, and part of translating strong and powerful feelings into language instead of acting out is strong and powerful language.

But Deborah needs some peace and quiet. Imani helps her think of times and places where Brittany can be as loud as she wants. Brittany also can start to understand that in some places, like on the bus or at meals, she needs to use a quiet voice, and that words can be powerful even when they are quiet.

Deborah realizes she can't make the behavior go away all the time and that she wants Brittany to use language instead of acting out. Deborah can channel the behavior, and she can let Brittany know when she needs a break in a way that is respectful of Brittany. "I know you are feeling really excited that Jamal is here to play, but I need some quiet for a few minutes. If you and Jamal can play quietly with your crayons until lunch time, then we can all go downstairs to the park where you two can yell all you like."

Handout C-3 | Handout C-1 | Module 2| Index

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