Activity 2-1:
Successful Conversations with Parents

Purpose: In this activity, participants will have an opportunity to review some of the basic elements of successful communications and to practice applying them in a Head Start setting.

Materials
Chart paper, Handout 3, lined paper, pens

Process
Ask the group to share what they know about the basic elements of successful communications. To provide structure for the brainstorming, distribute Handout 3, Elements of Successful Communication. This handout poses four questions:

  1. How do we show respect for the other person in a conversation?
  2. How do we help keep a conversation open and moving forward?
  3. What should we avoid doing so that we don't block the progress of conversation?
  4. What cultural or personal factors do we need to take into account when we are having a conversation with someone?

Provide several minutes for participants to reflect on these questions. Then solicit responses for each question in turn. Write participants' responses on chart paper, and encourage participants to take notes on their handout.

Depending on the previous communication skills training of the participants, responses may vary. Several possible responses to each question are listed below. If any of these are not raised in the group brainstorming, raise and discuss them yourself.

How do we show respect for the other person in a conversation?

  1. By giving people time to form thoughts, to respond, and to complete their statements.
  2. By focusing on the concern that the other person is expressing.
  3. By letting the other person begin the conversation or do a lot of the talking.

How do we help keep a conversation open and moving forward?

By using:

  1. Door Openers ("Would you like to talk about it?" or "You seem up set")
  2. Encouragers ("I'd like to hear more about what you think" or "I'm here if you want to talk over your ideas")
  3. Open Questions ('What do you hope for in offering to serve on the Policy Council?" or "What are some of your ideas for our class room?")
  4. Nodding, saying "yes' or "no" or "I hear you" or "uh-huh" or "tell me more"
  5. Facial and body expressions that show interest

What should we avoid doing so that we don't block the progress of a conversation?

  1. Blaming ("We wouldn't be in this situation if you hadn't...")
  2. Saying "always" or "never" ("My son always loses the papers you send home")
  3. Name-calling or labeling ("You're such a workaholic")
  4. Giving advice or commentary ("If I were in your shoes I would..." or "Something just like that happened to my sister. She....")
  5. Lecturing or threatening ("Prompt medical attention is very important" or "This will be your child's last week here unless you provide us with completed immunization forms")
  6. Avoiding or belittling another's concern ("It's not really so bad")
  7. Facial and body expressions that show lack of interest

What cultural and personal factors do we need to take into account when we are having a conversation with someone?

  1. Each family may have its own ways of communicating. For example, in some families someone other than the parent (an elder, family member or community member) may be the key contact for family issues.
  2. Body language varies among cultures. For example, different cultures make different use of eye contact, physical distance between speakers, and unspoken gestures.
  3. Consider the physical arrangement between all of the people in your conversation so that everyone shares control. Be aware of how this factor can affect a conversation if, for example, one person is behind a desk, at the head of the table or standing above the other. Also be aware of the seating arrangements for group conversations. Are staff and parents seated separately or together? Would the parties to the conversation feel more comfortable sitting in a circle of chairs rather than in rows?
  4. Remember that people have different learning styles. For some people, being told information is not the best way for them to receive information. Hands-on demonstrations, handouts or visuals may work better for them.
  5. Everyone has a culture. Being aware of your own cultural lens through which you view the world is as important as trying to understand others.

Direct participants' attention to page 3 of the handout, which presents a dialogue between a Head Start staff member and a parent. Ask for two volunteers to read the dialogue. Then ask participants how the staff member conveyed respect, used communications helpers, and took into account cultural and personal aspects of the parent. Also have them indicate the points in the dialogue where the staff member blocked the conversation. Have participants discuss whether either the parent or the staff member, or both, met their goals for the conversation.

Then divide the group into four teams. Direct each team to create a script between a Head Start staff person and a parent that includes some of the elements of successful communications (conveying respect, communication helpers, and being attentive to culture and person). Teams may also include communication blockers in their script. Give each team several sheets of lined paper and pens, and tell them they have 20 minutes to write their script.

Reconvene the large group. Have two volunteers from each team role play their script. Then have participants identify the elements of successful communication in the conversation. Also have them identify any communication blockers. For each blocker, ask for suggestions on how it could be turned into a helper.

Debriefing
Ask these questions: