Think about the part music plays in your life. What are your experiences, either creating or listening to music? How does it influence your well-being? For many people the relationship between mental health and music is strong.
In a preschool classroom, making music begins as a social event. You can help children experience and use music as a mental health tool in many ways.
Music creates a mood. One teacher described the power of music in her childhood by saying, "When my head was clogged and I had to deal with unhappy things, music was the one thing that made me feel better. Music calms, excites, soothes, energizes, and lulls. Plan musical experiences carefully, defining your purpose. If it is constantly in the background, the potential and impact will be lessened.
Music is a form of self-expression. The music a person creates comes from the feelings inside her. Rhythm, melody, and words are all ways of communicating. For some, music is the most comfortable way to express themselves. A teacher remembered how her grandfather expressed his grief by humming and singing.
Music may also lead children to express themselves verbally. If the words of a song trigger a memory, they may initiate a conversation about birth, death, or a past holiday. Select songs with this in mind. In her book, Windows To Our Children, Violet Qaklander tells us about folk songs. 'There are songs about every feeling and life situation, nonsense songs, and songs that tell stories. Because such songs have lasted through time, they never appear contrived or cute.' They add vitality, beauty, and power to children's emotions, imaginations, and experiences."9
Music teaches. A music experience provides many opportunities for fun, being part of a group, listening, following directions, and verbal expression. Songs can convey information, reinforce cognitive skills, and help children cope. Music with movement encourages physical development. If you cant find an appropriate song, make one up.
You do not have to be a musician, or even have a good voice, to make music a meaningful experience for children. All you need is an appreciation of its possibilities and the freedom to experiment.
9Oaklander, Violet. Windows To Our Children.
Moab, Utah: Real People Press, 1978, p. 1 16.
| Benefits:
Groundwork: The Experience: |
Children can feel a sense of belonging as they join in this song.
Use the tune of "Here We Go 'Round the Mulberry Bush' for this song. Have rhythm instruments for your whole class on hand. Give each child an instrument and together march around the room singing "I'm a Member of the Band." I'm a member of the band
This is the way I play my_______________
Lyrics for "I'm a Member of the Band" by Judy Lincoln. Repeat these lines for each instrument being used. End with a repeat of the first verse. |
| Variations: | Try using the children's names as you sing. This is the way Chad plays
the _________.
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| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork: |
As they enjoy this book, children learn that all of us live' together
in a world made colorful by human variety and differences.
People written and illustrated by Peter Speir, Doubleday and Company, Inc. Garden City, New York, 1980. Because of the detail, it is important to pre-read the book, becoming familiar with the themes and perhaps choosing a few pages that you think your class would particularly like. You will find many of the themes you have encountered in AS I AM. This might be a time to renew ideas and recall experiences you and the class have shared. |
| The Experience: | Read People with small groups of children, no more than five.
They need to be close enough to the pages to see the drawings and notice
special details. You may want to read quite rapidly in some sections and
go into more depth in others. In one center, a small group was so fascinated
that they spent the entire story time talking about just two pages.
Whenever possible, tie a fact in the book to the children's own experience. Be enthusiastic about the unique human expression that each picture illustrates. "People all have faces and bodies and feelings and ideas and dreams. And each face and body is different from every other. People have many ideas and ways of making their dreams come true." |
| Variations: | Use People as a reference book for interesting ideas related to acceptance and understanding. It is a source of information about many aspects of human life all over the world. |
| Benefits:
Groundwork: |
Family awareness and a sense of belonging are created when families
are the focus of a special week.
Family is defined differently for each of us. The children in your class probably represent a broad variety of families. Whatever its makeup, each child feels a sense of belonging to her family. Respect these differences and feelings as you proceed with, this experience. Plan a special week of family awareness activities. Do a "family" experience every day. Encourage each child to bring in a family photo. Send requests home well in advance. Children without photographs may want to make collages using magazine pictures or have you take their pictures with a family member or friend. Make sure you contribute a photo or collage too. Discuss FAMILY WEEK with parents. Communicate through newsletters, parent meetings, and personal contacts. Prepare them for the children's questions and responses. Involve them in planning and carrying out a family potluck or picnic. |
| The Experience: | Let the children know that you have planned a special week of activities
to celebrate and learn about the many different kinds of families.
On the first day, allow time for the children to share their photos and collages with you. Though not all children will participate verbally, give each the chance to talk about the members of her family. Children may focus on a grandparent, a sibling, or even a pet. Ask, 'What is a family?' "What do families do for us?" Share something about the family you grew up in or your family now. Point out that each family is special and different. Post all the pictures and collages on a bulletin board. Continue through the week with other family experiences such as the ones listed below:
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| Reflections: | This may be a sensitive subject for some children. They may have just experienced divorce, remarriage, or foster care and their "family identity' is changing. Acknowledge their feelings, whatever they may be. Respect any reluctance to talk. Some children may consider members of the class or other important people as being a special kind of family. |
| Benefits:
Materials:
The Experience: |
Caring for an animal helps children begin to value living beings.
A classroom pet or pets (such as chameleons, gerbils, guinea pigs, rabbits, fish, turtles, or a hen), appropriate housing and food, a supply of fresh bedding and litter if needed. The classroom pets have names and are part of the 'family." They live in a quiet corner of the room. The children visit them daily, but do not handle them too much. Feeding and cleaning chores are rotated along with other classroom duties. You will have to assume responsibility for overseeing daily care and finding a reliable caretaker each weekend and vacation. It will be your decision whether or not to embark on the adventure of breeding a pet. One center had a wonderful experience hatching the eggs of a pet hen named "Jessica." She was the center of attention and many conversations about responsibilities, healthy foods, fears, and being gentle. The cook who carried out this project commented, "All the children showed an interest in feeding, watering, and cleaning. I feel honored that I could share the full circle of life with the children." |
| Reflections: | At an age when the children's primary experience is being cared for,
they can take the caregiver role with pets. In this role, they assume on-going
personal responsibility, share warm feelings, and gain knowledge of animal
life.
What if a pet dies? This is a real sorrow for the whole group. Yet, it also permits children to experience death as a normal part of life. With your help, they can ask questions when they are ready to, grieve openly, and try to understand their often conflicting feelings. The birth of an animal can also provide valuable learning as you answer the children's questions about life cycles, reproduction, and anatomy. |
| Variations: | Use the following recipe to make biscuits for children's pets at home. Animals are often members of the family and this is a good way to show caring and sharing. |
2c. whole wheat flour 1c. rye flour 1c. corn meal 2c. bulgur (cracked wheat) 1/2 ac. nonfat dry milk 4 tsp. salt 1 pg. dry yeast 2c. chicken broth 1 egg plus 1 Tbs. milk to brush on top warm water
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| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork:
The Experience: |
Learning how to do housekeeping tasks cooperatively helps children
feel confident they can share in family responsibilities.
Vacuum cleaners and brooms, sponges and soap, laundry baskets and clean clothes, or window cleaner and rags. Choose several developmentally appropriate household jobs for the children to learn and practice (vacuuming, washing windows, sorting laundry, and cleaning sinks, storage shelves, or pet cages). Consider duration and group size for the project and then collect the necessary materials or equipment. As an Introduction to this experience, share one of your childhood responsibilities with the class. Find out what jobs some of the children do at home right now. Talk about how each member of a family (or class), no matter what size or age, has a role to play. "Part of being a family is sharing and working together to get jobs done." "Let's see how we do one of these jobs." As you demonstrate a task for the entire group, help the children plan. Show them how to get ready. Divide the job into manageable, child-size portions and explain the steps involved in doing the job safely and well. Remember clean up, tool Perhaps list the steps on a large sheet of paper with space to check off accomplishments. To practice, break into smaller groups, each with an adult. Find some aspect of everyone's work to compliment. 'You worked hard to scrub the sink. No more fingerprints there!" Your enthusiasm, sense of fun, and appreciation will help the children see a job well done as a pleasurable experience. When a child begins to feel confident, help her make plans for doing the job independently at home. This might become a special event, involving a letter, a form to fill out, or a gift coupon from the child to her family. |
| Reflections: | This is a good short-term project, or an on-going activity where children
build a repertoire of skills to use at preschool and at home. Consider
organizing Fall, Winter, Spring, and Year-End Cleanings.
Take photos of the children "at work." Post them on a bulletin board for awhile, and then add them to each child's BOOK ABOUT ME. |
| Variations: |
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| At Preschool:
Why We Do
What You Can
|
In the housekeeping, dress-up, and block areas, the children often
pretend to do the "real-life" work they see done at home. Boys and girls
make believe they are baking, driving the car, washing dishes, or putting
the baby to sleep. We also give them the chance to help with real classroom
chores. Some of these are cooking, setting and clearing the table, serving
food, and cleaning up after free play. They can even learn to vacuum, clean
mirrors, and wash dishes.
We have all heard preschool children proudly say, "I can do it myself!" As they practice real work, children become more independent and self-reliant. These qualities contribute to se if-esteem. At the same time, children learn about helping others and cooperating to get a job done. This healthy process Is part of making friends and belonging to any group. Let your child help with household and outdoor chores. If children are allowed to help when they are very young, they will be more likely to have cooperative attitudes and confidence as they grow up. Here are a few jobs preschoolers can help you do: Carry groceries. Take groceries out of the bag. Scrub the bathtub. Wash windows or the car. Sort laundry. Set the table. Put dog or cat food in the pet dish. Rake leaves. Carry wood for a fireplace or wood stove. Sometimes you could get the job done "twice as fast by yourself." You
don't always need to include your child, but as often as you can give her
a useful task. Then she'll have the chance to say, "I can do that myself!"
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ABOUT LISTENING
Listening carefully and non-judgment ally to children helps to validate their thoughts and feelings and contributes to their self-esteem. As you listen you are also modeling one important way of relating positively to others. This is a skill children can best learn by example.
There are many aspects to good listening. Attentiveness can be demonstrated by getting down to the child's level and maintaining eye contact. Your facial expressions tell even very young children when you are really paying attention. Active, reflective listening responds to feelings behind the child's words. It gives you and the child opportunities to clarify whether you are understanding one another.
There are three steps in the active listening process:
- 1. The child sends a message in words, manner, tone,
or body expression. "We're going camping this weekend!"
2. You interpret the feelings behind the message and check to see if you are correct. This tells the child she is being listened to. 'You seem to be pretty excited about going."
3. The child affirms your feedback ('Yes, I love camping!"), or denies it and tries to send a clearer message ("No, I don't like sleeping outside.").
Give children many opportunities to speak and listen to one another and adults, at meal times and in groups of all sizes. Use a tape recorder regularly. Most children enjoy hearing themselves and peers on tape, and it reinforces the need to listen, as well as talk.
If possible, plan some of your parent meetings around the topic of listening. Discuss the importance of listening attentively to their children.
Children need to develop listening skills for practical
purposes, such as being able to follow directions. Most important, however,
the ability to listen can help them build healthy, caring relationships.
| Benefits:
The Experience: |
Cooperatively building a story helps children to learn to listen to
each other.
With A small group, five or fewer, sit at a table or in a circle. Tell the children you are going to make up a story together and, in order to do that, you all need to listen to each person very carefully. You start with a line or two, and have the children take turns adding to the story .Choose a topic that is current interest to the children. It may be related to a recent field trip, class visitor, conflict the children are working on resolving, or pure fantasy. Some examples of story beginnings are:
"This story is about a girl named Sally. Sally wanted to be a truck driver when she grew up. Everyone told her that only boys become truck drives. But Sally..." |
| Reflections: | Play this game regularly. Vary the topics accordingly to the children's
interests and your educational goals. Find other times to encourage listening
- during meals, circle, small group play, and moments of conflict.
Listening is a lot of work! Review your own listening skills often. Do you pay attention to both words and body language? Stop what you are doing and look at the child who is speaking? Get on the same eye level? Reflect what is said, instead of criticizing, solving, or judging? |
| Variations: | Staff in one center found this experience difficult for their children, and created a story at the clay table instead. As the children talked about what they were doing, the teacher wrote down what they said. When she read the story at circle time, the children loved looking for their names in the text. |
| Benefits:
Groundwork:
The Experience: |
By noticing who is missing, each child becomes more conscious of the
other children in the class and is able to identify them by name.
In all classroom activities, encourage awareness of others and use of names. At meals, an important social time, Susan can be asked to pass Justin the muffins. A teacher can comment on how well Dale and Tom are sharing the blocks. This preparation will help children get to know the members of the group. Later, when children are absent, others will be able to recall them by name. Sit in a circle with a small group of five or six children. Explain that they will take turns being hiders or guessers. Go around the circle, identifying each child by name. Ask one to leave the room, and another to hide. The child outside the room returns and guesses who is hiding. Keep playing until everyone has had a turn. |
| Reflections: | It will take time to build the children's awareness of the group as
a whole. Begin with small groups. Later in the year, the entire class will
probably be able to play the game.
Teachers and parents report that children enjoy this experience. The "hide and seek" feature is fun and manageable within the classroom setting. |
| Variations: | Attach photos with names of the children to coat hooks or place mats. Seeing their friends and classmates in photographs helps children make associations and use names more often. |
| At Preschool:
Why We Do
What You Can
|
At preschool we are helping your child get to know everyone in the
group. We try to use the children's names in many ways throughout the day.
As they hear the names of their friends and classmates, they begin to use
them too. We sometimes play group awareness games. When a child is absent,
we encourage the rest to think about who is missing.
Your child' s world is expanding beyond the family. She is meeting more people and making her own friends. She, like all of us, enjoys the feeling of belonging. As your child grows, she will belong to many groups - at school, in your neighborhood, and in the community. As part of a group, we learn to listen, talk and share. We learn how to be a leader and how to follow an idea from someone else. We learn about belonging. Help your child think of all the people she knows. Some she knows quite well; others she knows only slightly. We often think of a child's world as being very small. Making a list can help her see that she belongs in many different groups. Questions like these may help you and your child make this important list. Who do you know at preschool? Who are the other members of your family? Those at home, or far away? Who lives in your neighborhood or your apartment building? Kids? Grownups? Who are the people in the stores where you shop? Young children are learning to remember things, to hold ideas and people
in their memories. You can have fun helping your child understand how many
people she knows - all the ways in which she belongs.
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ABOUT RESOLVING CONFLICTS
Conflicts are inevitable and frequent in our lives. How we resolve these conflicts influences our mental health. Preschool children come to us with a variety of established patterns for dealing with conflict. We are in a position to help them practice positive, non-violent ways of solving their problems every day. Self-confidence and satisfying relationships are potential benefits.
It is possible to create a classroom atmosphere in which children will have many opportunities to resolve conflicts successfully.
- Begin by establishing an atmosphere of trust. When children are protected by consistent rules, they can learn that their rights will be respected. Rules that protect individuals and promote cooperation contribute to the development of trust. GETTING ALONG gives you a process for making and introducing rules.
- Observe carefully, noticing children who need special help resolving conflicts. One child might respond aggressively, while another withdraws. Provide guidance to these children as they learn to modify their behavior.
- Point out the advantages of cooperation. Cooking projects, classroom cleanup, or group play all involve community efforts. "Look at how fast we can clean up when we all work together. We will have extra time outside today.,, "The two or you are doing an especially good job with that difficult puzzle."
- Help children understand their own feelings and those of others. A fallen block building, a beautiful painting, or a fight over a toy are all opportunities to talk about feelings. Reflect children's non-verbal communication. "You look very happy, Tommy. You seem pleased with your picture." Ask children how they feel. "How did you feel when Samantha took your truck?' Encourage children to listen and talk directly to each other when conflicts arise. Too often children turn to the teacher to communicate for them. "Josh, Mary wants to tell you how she felt when you hit her."
- Provide models of non-violent conflict resolution. Children learn from observing others. How do you communicate with your co-workers or parents? Regularly look for examples of positive problem solving on TV and in children's literature.
- Help children understand their own successes and failures. "Johnny, I noticed that when you calmly asked Mark for a turn with the bike, he gave it to you right away." "Sue, when you grabbed the doll from Joe, he hit you. You did not like that. Can you think of something else you could have done?" Verbalizing helps children remember this information and use it to resolve future conflicts.
- Give children time to resolve conflicts on their own. Be on hand to observe their interaction and intervene only if necessary. Afterwards comment on their interaction, reinforcing positive skills and filling in information when needed.
- 1. Listen: Give each child involved in the conflict
a chance to talk about her feelings.
2. Define: What is each child's problem and what does each one want? Preschool children have difficulty understanding other points of view.
3. Sum up: In your words, reflect the children's feelings.
4. Brainstorm: Ask the children to think of possible solutions. You may want to write them down.
5. Evaluate: Be sure everyone's feelings are considered. Allow the children to evaluate their ideas and consider which alternatives are feasible.
6. Decide: Restate the problem, summarize the possible solutions, and decide on one.
7. Review: After living with the decision, review it. Revise it if necessary.10
| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork: |
Children develop problem-solving skills and consideration for each
other's feelings as they brainstorm solutions to familiar conflicts.
Two puppets (Punch and Crunch), a little square of cloth (very ragged). Think about some of the conflicts that you experience. How are they resolved? Are they power struggles with winners and losers? Or, are everyone's feelings considered in the solutions? Consider some of the ways you create an atmosphere of cooperation and communication in your classroom. When conflicts arise, encourage the children to express their feelings, communicate with each other, and participate in finding an "everybody wins" solution. |
| The Experience: | With two puppets, recreate the following story for a small group of
children. You may want to establish a special team of puppets to work out
conflicts on a regular basis, or just problems. Act out the story as far
as it goes, and then ask the children how it should end.
Let them suggest several solutions, accepting them all as interesting or good ideas. "What is the problem? How will _____________ feel about doing_______or_______? Will ______________ help to solve the conflict?" Act out the solution the children decide are best. In one center a child suggested the story end with the puppets sharing a bed and blanket. The teacher had the child come up and tuck the two puppets into bed. |
| Reflections: | One teacher noted that this is a non-threatening way for children to
practice solving. They sympathize with the puppets and solutions come more
easily. She also recommended encouraging parents to participate. "It can
help them listen to their children and consider other ways of solving problems.'
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| Variations: | When a conflict arises in class, allow the children to brain storm solutions. Encourage them to make "I" statements about how they feel in such situations. Together make up puppet stories about their real conflicts. During a story, stop reading in the midst of a problem and let the children find an answer. |
| Crunch:
Punch: Crunch: Punch: Crunch: Punch: Crunch: Punch: Crunch: Punch: |
Guess what? Just guess what?
(sleepily) Wha.... Hey, that is my blanket (takes one end of it). Well, I just borrowed it. Mmm. (rips blanket away) I said it's mine, an - I - want it now! (hits crunch) I hate you! You're mean (cries). Aw, come on. You don't need it. Besides, it's my very special blanket and I'm sleepy. (cries louder) Well, I want one too. Come on, it isn't that bad. I didn't think you'd get so upset. Boo-hoo.. .sob . . . sniff... -- How does this story end? -- |
These adult resource books may help you carry out the
goals of the Relating Section:
Center for Child and Family Development. Growing Up Strong. Oklahoma City, Oklahoma: Oklahoma State Department of Mental Health, 1984.
Crary, Elizabeth. Kids Can Cooperate. Seattle, Washington: Parenting Press, Inc., 1984.
Smith, Charles. Promoting the Social Development of Young Children. Palo Alto, California: Mayfield Publishing Co., 1982.
Wancemaker, Nancy, Kristin Hearn, and Sherrill Richarz.
More Than Graham Washington, D.C.: National Association for the
Education of Young Children, 1979.