Introduction
An understanding and acceptance of your many and varied
feelings is an important aspect of mental health. This awareness can help
you choose appropriate behavior, communicate honestly, and take good care
of yourself. As you come to terms with your emotional self, you are better
able to help children build security, use a sense of humor, and cope with
intense feelings.
Goals
This section's mental health goals are to encourage children to:
- 1) begin to identify and accept their feelings.
2) understand how a range of feelings can be expressed in appropriate ways, both verbal and nonverbal.
3) learn coping skills for dealing with difficult situations and feelings.
Developmental Considerations
Young children experience a full range of emotions. Beginning in infancy, they express their feelings directly and strongly. As children grow and acquire language, they begin to use words to express themselves. This broadening of self-expression allows children to communicate more fully with others and explore a variety of relationships.
A fundamental task in early childhood is coping with separation. Children are coming to terms with emotional separation - from parents, from home, and, especially when there is a new sibling, from "babyhood." In addition, society has increased the separations children face as more mothers go to work, families move, and parents divorce.
As preschoolers reach out, they begin to understand the
relationship between events in their lives, their feelings, and their behavior.
Expressing a broad range of emotions gives them a clearer awareness of
their "feeling" selves.
The tone you set and the way you arrange your classroom
can provide a secure place for recognition and expression of feelings.
Atmosphere:
- Promote security by establishing consistent classroom rules and routines. They will help the children feel comfortable and safe. When they know what to expect, children need not be apprehensive or "on guard."
- Develop trust. Your lap, hugs, and sympathetic ear help children feet cared for and accepted. The trusting child will be more comfortable with self-expression.
- Share laughter and fun with children. An important part of successful coping, humor can heal, relax, or inspire.
- Allow spontaneity. Address the children's feelings when the time is right, capturing the moment and feeling it intensely. You do not know ahead of time what joys, conflicts, or losses children will bring into your classroom.
- Children need a variety of settings to enrich their emotional growth. " . . . inner urges do dictate much of children's play, much of all play, and that is children's way to explore the whole inside world of feelings."7 Can children choose to be quiet, to create, to play, to be alone, or to be physical in your classroom?
- Give children a variety of spaces and props for dramatic play. Go beyond traditional roles and the "housekeeping" area. Help boys and girls "try on" many community and fantasy roles by providing occupational hats, a doctor's kit, a space suit, magic wands, or a superman cape. Give them large boxes or let them rearrange the furniture. With dolls and a doll house, allow boys and girls to rehearse life.
- View outdoor space from a new perspective. With planning, art, sand, water, and dramatic play can all take place outside.
- Your classroom arrangement can help children feel secure. A variety of play centers protected from each other by bookshelves and other informal barriers allow for privacy and physical safety.
7 Rogers. Fred
and Barry Head. Mr. Rogers Talks With Parents
Now York: Berkley Books. 1983, P. 98.
Teachers help children learn by valuing feelings and planning appropriate activities. Your skills as an observer, communicator, facilitator, and model help to create a mentally healthy environment in which young children can work to identify, express, and accept their feelings.
Observe the children's "body language" as you listen to their words. Most of what they tell you will be through posture, movement, behavior, and facial expressions. Tune in to this important communication, being careful not to make assumptions about meaning. A frown could imply many things, including fatigue, eye strain, sadness, or concentration.
Communicate your observations with acceptance. I realize you are furious. I would be, too, but I can't allow you to throw the puzzle across the room." "Your body looks so tense, Joan. Are you feeling frustrated with that zipper?" Children will begin to learn that feelings are OK when they experience acceptance from caring adults. Your comments will help them relate their feelings to the appropriate words.
Facilitate opportunities for children to consider the feelings of others, act out emotions, and brainstorm ways of coping. Provide for self-expression through art, play, music, and physical activities. Take advantage of -teachable moments" when they arise in your classroom. As children experience joy, sorrow, and frustration, talk about it. Encourage them to talk to each other, too. You will help them learn to choose healthy ways of expressing themselves.
Model genuine and appropriate expression of feelings.
When you tell the children you are angry, do your body. face, and voice
send the same message as your words? The children learn that their feelings
are OK when they recognize that you have them, too. At the same time, you
present them with alternatives for coping. I was so upset that I had to
take a long walk. I felt better when I got back."
Children and adults experience a broad range of emotions throughout life. It is healthy to recognize, accept, and talk with others about them and to learn terms more explicit than the typical "'mad, sad, or glad." Teachers can help preschool children explore and use the feelings words in our language, which is rich in words that describe complex emotions.
An important aspect of preschool is learning new words and beginning to understand what people mean by their words, looks, and gestures. As you talk, read, and share in their activities, the children's awareness and feeling vocabularies will grow. Even if a child does not begin to use a new word, it becomes a part of his receptive vocabulary. Some children will love having different, more accurate words to describe how they feel. "I feel miserable!" "My mother was delighted!"
You often will see young children's emotions reflected in their actions. These behavioral responses are important releases and should be encouraged. At the same time, however, you can offer them words to describe their feelings. Language can empower children. It allows them additional control as they seek support from those around them.
As you encourage children's expression and respond to their feelings, respect the complexity of their emotional lives. Avoid telling children how they feel, making assumptions, or putting "words in their mouths."
Work to expand your own feelings vocabulary. With practice you will gain awareness and new ways of talking about your emotional self. If you enrich your own vocabulary and begin to use a variety of "feeling words" with preschool children, their options for emotional self-expression will also increase.
Think about ways to broaden your feelings vocabulary. Here are some words to replace the familiar "mad, sad, glad":
| enraged | desolate | blissful |
| wrathful | miserable | elated |
| irritated | woebegone | delighted |
| frustrated | distressed | ecstatic |
| furious | gloomy | thrilled |
What feeling words could be used to describe these faces?
| Is she anxious, bashful, confused, apprehensive? It is hard to know for sure. |  |
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Can you think of five words that might reflect his feelings? |
| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork: |
Keeping a feelings photo album gives children repeated opportunities
to recognize a full range of emotions and the accompanying body language.
Camera, film, a photo album (commercial or homemade). Be prepared to "capture the moment" with a photo. Children are constantly expressing their feelings with posture, facial expression, movement, and behavior. At times you will need to make quick decisions with your co-workers - who intervenes to offer support and who takes a picture? |
| The Experience: | Introduce this experience the first week of school and continue it
throughout the year. Start by photographing expressive faces and bodies.
Ask the children what they are feeling and write down what they say. "Marie
is sad. She left her bear at home today." "Jason is proud of his block
building. "I am happy I built it so tall." Take pictures of adults too.
With the children's permission, mount the photographs in the album along with the quotes. Name the album so children know it is about feelings. Use it for discussion with individual children or small groups. Look at photos and point out examples of "body language" the children use. "Your clenched fists tell me you're upset." "Your arms are around each other. I can tell that you're feeling comfortable and friendly." Call attention to the album by regularly adding new photos. Have it available for the children to look at by themselves or with a friend. Children will gain self-awareness as they see themselves through the camera's eye. After you've all enjoyed the album during the year, put the pictures in the BOOKS ABOUT ME. |
| Reflections: | Take the photo album to parent meetings. It could stimulate interesting discussions and communicate the importance of being sensitive to children's feelings. |
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| Benefits:
Groundwork: The Experience: |
As they sing these words, children have a chance to express themselves
through movement.
Use the tune of "Mary Had a Little Lamb" to sing this song. Encourage the children to move like clouds, snow, and the sun while you sing "Weather Dance." |
- Clouds are floating all around
All around, all around
Dancing softly, little sound
Very quietly.
Snow is falling on the ground
On the ground, on the ground
Swirling, twirling, all around
Very quietly.
Sun is shining, oh so bright
See the light - bright, bright, bright
Flashing, flashing - very bright
Very quietly.
- Lyrics to "Weather
Dance" by Judy Lincoln.
| Reflections: Variations: |
You do not have to be musical to enjoy music with children. It doesn't
matter if you can't carry a tune. Put your inhibitions behind you and have
fun!
Make up verses for whatever you want to sing about. Ask the children to be animals or rainstorms, to point to colors or shapes. |
ABOUT PUPPETS
Puppets are one of the most powerful mental health tools in your classroom. A puppet is an active character who captures the attention of many children easily and fully. Although tangible and believable, a puppet can transport listeners to a fantasy world. There is often safety and freedom in expressing feelings, positive and negative, to a puppet or through a puppet*s voice. Children who learn to use puppets have unlimited opportunities to work with their feelings in acceptable, imaginative ways.
Bring a puppet to life by giving it a personality. Pick several adjectives to describe its character - happy, bouncy, and talkative, or tired, grumpy, and troubled. Let these adjectives define: the puppet's actions. Next, give your creation a name, a special voice, and a home in an old purse or lunch box.
Practice having your puppet emerge from its home to interact with the children. When the puppet talks, open its mouth on the first syllable of each word. Be sure the puppet looks directly at the audience. Plan conversations that use feeling words, colorful phrases, noises, and humor. Once you've become friendly with your puppet character, introduce him or her to the children.
You may want to create several distinct puppet personalities, as well as having a variety of nondescript puppets for play. Puppets are versatile and readily available for planned or spontaneous use in a time of individual or classroom crisis, lively fun, or quiet sharing.
Base some of your classroom experiences on puppets the children make. Help them create personalities, homes, and voices. This taps their feelings and fantasies, and allows them choices.
Important opportunities for growth are available when
children get to know and rely on certain puppet characters (SEEING RED).
They will build relationships, practice roles, and rehearse life experiences
as they interact with familiar puppet friends.
| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork:
The Experience: |
By creating and playing with puppets, children have endless opportunities
for self-expression.
Lunch-size paper bags, markers or crayons, collage materials. Plan plenty of time for this experience. Many of your children will want to play with their puppet creations. A theater may encourage development of puppet shows, but is not necessary for meaningful play. Set puppet-making materials out on a large table. Introduce the experience by placing a paper bag on your hand and showing the children how the puppets will work. Explain that they can use crayons, markers, or collage materials to make puppet faces. You may want to review the facial features, mentioning eyes, nose, mouth, and perhaps a freckle or two. Allow time for the children to make their puppets, giving help without direction. Many preschool children cannot do representational drawing. Though their puppet faces may be no more than scribbles, this will not inhibit expressive play. Encourage children to talk about and through their puppets with open questions such as: "Who is your puppet?" "Tell me about your puppet?" Try speaking directly to the puppet. "How old are you?" "Where do you live?" "Tell me about the girl you are with." Enjoy watching the children as they play with their puppets. What kinds of interactions do you see? How are these different from other play interactions? What are they talking about? Teachers in one center noted that the children stayed with this activity for an unusually long time and many non-talkers joined in the conversation. |
| Reflections: | Often children will use puppets to express thoughts and feelings that they are not comfortable stating directly. At these times, puppet play is a valuable tool. However, it is a mistake to make assumptions about the meaning of this play. For example, aggression towards another puppet could be a reflection of deeply felt feelings or an imitation of last night's TV show. |
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| At Preschool:
Why We Do
What You Can
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Puppet play is one of the many activities we do that encourages children
to express feelings. Sometimes we paint small puppets on the children's
hands. Other times we make puppets out of paper bags. We have puppet conversations
about all kinds of things. Your child may want to bring his puppet home
so you can hear about his adventures and play a role yourself.
Most young children enter eagerly into -puppet play." Some will watch
the activity of others for awhile before joining in. This is fine, since
each of us approaches an experience differently.
Children have a lot of fun with puppets. They are also a valuable way for children to express their feelings. With puppet friends, children are free to say whatever is on their minds or in their hearts. Puppets don't need to be expensive or complicated to make. Try creating your own puppets out of socks. Ask your child to help you sort the laundry. When you come across a sock, slide it over your hand and push in a piece of the material around your thumb to create your puppet's mouth. Move your thumb and fingers as if you're going to pick something up. Try using an interesting voice - maybe high and squeaky or low and whispery. Have your child find his own puppet in the laundry basket and have a conversation with him. Talk about your plans for the day or what he thinks about something. Make up a story about your puppet or just have fun being silly. |
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Materials: Groundwork:
The Experience: |
This puppet dialogue helps children recognize feelings and consider
various ways of coping with problems.
A dog puppet, shoe box. The following story, one of many possibilities, focuses on the fear of being lost. It is about a puppy named George who lives in-a shoe box painted like a building. Practice the dialogue and plan how you will involve the children. The story can be lengthened or shortened to suit the needs of the class. Children at different developmental stages will vary in their ability to identify feelings. In smaller groups, children can be more involved. Introduce George and give the children plenty of time to get acquainted. In one center, children began to ask questions immediately: "Where is your mom? Why do you live in that box? Where do,you sleep?" If they are allowed to satisfy their curiosity and feel comfortable with George, children will be better able to empathize as they do the experience. Have George talk to the children about the time he got lost. At appropriate times have him ask them how they think he felt, what he should have done, and if they ever feel the same way. |
| Reflections: | For many children, a puppet can eventually become a good friend who provides comfort, shares joy, listens to problems, and suggests ways to cope. |
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George: "You wouldn't believe what happened to me yesterday! I was out walking with my mother. We were looking for things to eat. I stopped to look in a store window, and when I turned around I couldn't see my mother. (to the children) Have you ever had that happen? (listen to answers, ask questions to encourage dialogue) Where were you? Was anyone else with you?"
Teacher: (to George) "How did you feel when you were lost?"
George: "I was scared. I looked all around. I ran from one store to the next, but I couldn't see her. I started to shake." (shake puppet)
Teacher: (to class) "How would you feet if you were lost? (allow for lots of answers and more questions) Now, let's find out what happened to George."
George: "I had to walk around by myself for a long time. I met a strange man who wanted me to go with him."
Teacher: "What did you do?"
George: "In a very loud voice I said, 'No I won't go with you!' I wanted someone else to hear me."
Teacher: (to George) "Did anyone come by and help you?"
George: "Yes, a big dog came by and said he had seen my mother looking for me.
Teacher: (to class) "Another dog helped him. Who else in the neighborhood might help? Who helped you when you were lost?"
Teacher: (to George) "How did you find your mother then?"
George: "I ran right over and there she was. She gave me a big hug and patted my head with her paws. (to children) How do you think I felt then? (allow for many responses) Well, you're right, I felt__________ (repeat a phrase given by one of the children). But, you know, I suddenly felt very tired. I wanted to be rocked to sleep."
Teacher: "What happened next?"
George: "Since I was so
tired, we went right home. It was great to be safe at home after being
lost. When you are afraid, what makes you feel better?"
Conclude by having George return to his shoe box home with
an assurance that he will come again.
| Benefits: Materials: Groundwork: |
This poetry experience incorporates body parts and feelings as it uses
humor to temper real or imagined fears.
"Boa Constrictor" from Where The Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein, Harper and Row, 1974. Markers, two pillowcases or a sheet, scrap material. Become familiar with the poem before sharing it with the children. Practice using your face, voice, and body to convey the feeling of being swallowed by a boa constrictor. Next, use two pillowcases to make your own boa constrictor. Cut off the closed end of one pillowcase. Sew the two pillowcases together. You should have a long tube with one open end - a boa constrictor long enough for a child to crawl into or pull up over his head. For children who do not want to be enclosed in the pillowcase tube, a sheet will do fine. You'll want your boa constrictor to be funny and colorful, rather than frightening. Use pom-poms for eyes and scrap material for two fangs. |
| The Experience: | Introduce the children to this collection of poems. explain that you
have chosen one poem for today, and offer to read others of their choice
later. Read the poem through, touching each body part as it is mentioned.
Then introduce your boa con stricter. Pass him around so everyone can touch
him and get acquainted.
Ask for a volunteer to be swallowed by your boa constrictor. Ham it up and exaggerate as you recite the poem again. Gradually pull the pillowcase or sheet boa constrictor up towards the child's head. Give everyone a turn who wants one. Leave the boa constrictor in the classroom for several days, or make him available upon request. Do this activity during transitional times, while waiting to wash hands for lunch, or to go outside. |
| Reflections: | Emphasize that this is a pretend game and keep the atmosphere light
and funny. You are providing a safe, fun environment for dealing with a
scary idea. Don't push anyone into having a turn. Allow hesitant children
plenty of time to get acquainted with the boa constrictor. Some may not
want their heads completely covered. Some may only want their toes or knees
"swallowed." These differences are normal and reflect varied temperaments.
In the future, as they read or learn about snakes or other animals which may seem frightening, the children may be able to rely on this positive, pretend experience. |
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This book helps children explore their fearful fantasies and recognize
that others have fears, too.
There's a Nightmare in My Closet by Mercer Mayer, Dial Books for Young Readers, New York, 1968. Pre-read the book, tuning in to your own feelings about the story and illustrations. Was there a bedtime "monster" in your childhood? Become familiar with the language, so you will read out loud with comfort, a light tone, and an element of fun. It's worth noting that this story is written in the first-person, as if the boy is speaking. As a result, children can more easily identify and empathize. It is a good idea to let parents know about this experience ahead of time. They will be prepared when children come home talking about "nightmares" or "monsters." One center did this by adapting the experience for use at a parent meeting. |
| The Experience: | When the children are settled for a story, briefly discuss the book.
Point out that the author wrote the story and drew the pictures. If you
share the details that make each book special, children soon will begin
to notice, make distinctions, and recognize favorite authors on their own.
After you have read the story, talk about "things that scare us at night." An understanding but matter-of-fact tone, plenty of acknowledgement, and laps available for cuddling will help the children feel comfortable as they listen and talk about their fearful fantasies. Your conversation may use a variety of fear words (scared, frightened, afraid, terrified, worried) and include some of these questions or acknowledging responses: "1 get scared sometimes like the boy in the story, do you?"
"Tell me about your nightmare." |
| Reflections: | Read this story again and again. There is security in repetition and
familiarity. One center found this book particularly comforting to a fearful
child. "Larry asks for this story every time he's in the book area. He's
an extremely active boy who listens intently to Nightmare."
Some children may mention very personal subjects or seem extremely disturbed by nightmares. You will want to decide how to respond if they do. It may mean further individual conversation with the child, discussion with parents and fellow teachers, or follow-up with a consultant. Consider having an extra copy of this book available to send home with a child who frequently requests the story. Share your observations and reasons for suggesting the book for reading at home with parents. |
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