Everyone benefits from knowing when and how to relax. We are more in control of our bodies, feelings, and thoughts when we can "unwind" or change the pace. At particularly stressful times, relaxation skills can help us focus and concentrate on seeking positive solutions.
Each of us has a style of relaxation, based on temperament, physical needs and abilities, and the situation. Some people take long walks or a run, while others watch TV or read. Still others do meditation or visualization exercises. What helps you relax? How do you know when you are under stress, or just need a change of pace? Do you relax regularly?
It's important for preschool children to learn relaxation skills. Although children often relax more easily and naturally than adults, some need help learning how to release their tension. Sometimes a whole group is tense. Sometimes it is just one or two children. By becoming aware of how tension feels in their bodies and what they can do to get rid of it, children learn self-control.
You can help by:
- noting each child's style. What stresses him, how does he show tension, and what seems to help him relax?
- reflecting your observations to the children. "You are frowning John. Are you worried about something?'
- guiding children to relaxing places or activities such as: quiet music, water or sand table, books, the alone corner, your lap, and PACEMAKERS or CLOUD NINE.
- discussing tension and relaxation with the children. Help them learn the words and act out what they mean. Try being a melting ice cube, a soldier and then a rag doll, or a stop sign and then a flower blowing in the breeze.
- planning physical activities. More time outside and indoor gross motor equipment provide important relaxation opportunities for particularly active children, or the whole group.
- letting children know what you do to relax. "I feel jittery and uptight. I think I'll take ten deep breaths."
- giving positive reinforcement. "What a good decision you made, Amy. You found a quiet spot to relax."
| Benefits:
The Experience: |
By learning a way to focus their energy and gain perspective. children
are better able to cope.
At a time when the class needs to make a transition, try a relaxing fantasy journey. Gather the children and take a few deep breaths. Use a quiet, slow voice, pausing between sentences. "Now sit quietly and close your eyes. I imagine a beautiful day. We're going to go up and ride on a cloud. Look up into the sky. What colors do you see? What does your cloud look like? Can you feel yourself floating up into the cloud? Sit on the cloud, and feel how soft and fluffy it is. You can feel the breeze going past your ears. You can smell the fresh air. It smells like flowers. Taste a little piece of the cloud; notice what it tastes like. Now float back down from the cloud, very slowly, and back into the room. When you are ready, you can open your eyes." The children may want to talk about their experiences. |
| Reflections: | Imagination and relaxation are important stress management tools. They allow us to step out of our habits for a short while and get a new perspective. Our thoughts, wishes, and feelings all come into play. Children's responses to this experience will vary. Some will relax. and some won't. Others may relax very deeply. Everyone has his own style for relaxing and responds to each situation differently. One child will find visualization helpful, while another may need strenuous physical activity. Help children recognize, what they need. "Seth, I noticed that you really calmed down when we did this experience. How do you feel now?" |
| Variations: | Make up another simple inner "field trip." It might be a walk on a
peaceful beach or. a ride on. a magic carpet. Avoid taking the children
to a place, that might be frightening. Tie in your suggestions with the
five senses: what do you see, hear, taste, smell, or touch? How do you
feel? Keep the overall time less than one minute.
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| Benefits:
Groundwork:
The Experience: |
Learning how to relax can help children gain self-control.
Use relaxation techniques whenever you need them. In the midst of a hectic time with young children, it is often difficult to remember that you can reset the pace. Children can also learn to calm themselves and stay in control. Activity is wild and unfocused, it's too noisy, and you can feel energy scattering. Now is the time- for a "pacemaker." Call the children together with a bell, a spoken signal or some other attention-getter. Look each one in the- eye and speak firmly as you ask that they join in one of the following: - singing a repetitive, calming song with a strong
steady beat
Pacemakers can be used successfully with one child or a small group. As you work with this technique, you will notice which ideas work for different children. Their varying styles and temperaments will influence their moods or behaviors and how they relax. Help children develop a language to describe these experiences by introducing and using such words as "relaxation," "calm," and "pacemakers." |
| Reflections: | Begin with pacemakers that feel comfortable to you. As you practice
them, you may find the children respond well to repeated use of a particular
relaxation technique.
Avoid overusing pacemakers. Children naturally have times of high spirits
and energy. Rather than maintaining constant order, join in their fun and
encourage their joy.
Pacemakers help to: - provide a physical activity that releases tension;
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| At Preschool: Why We Do What We Do: What You Can Do At Home: |
Sometimes at preschool, things get a little hectic and crazy! When
it's time to calm down, we often try a "Pacemaker" as a way of helping
the children relax. Rather than adding to the confusion by raising our
voices, we flash the lights or ring a bell to get everyone's attention.
Then we begin a relaxing, repetitive action that, as the children join
in, helps to break the wild mood. It might be a calm, rhythmic slapping
of the thighs, singing a soft, familiar song, or speaking in a whisper
about what is coming next.
Children, even when very young, can begin to learn self-control. We try to be models for them by introducing and using simple relaxation techniques. With practice, children can recognize when they are tense or getting out-of-control and learn ways of pacing themselves. As they grow, their mastery of self-control will be far more satisfying than discipline imposed by others. You can help your child learn self-control or self-discipline at home. When things get too loud and boisterous, begin to clap as you chant, "One, Two, Three, Four." Have him join you in this "game," After a minute or two, slow down the chant and clapping and lower your voice to a whisper. Hopefully, you'll both be more relaxed and the mood will have changed. Now you can redirect him or begin a new activity together on a positive note. Let us know about any Pacemakers that work for you. |
ABOUT SELF-EXPRESSION
In the preschool classroom, young children need regular and ongoing opportunities to creatively express themselves through play, art, music, and movement. The child who is encouraged to be creative, imaginative, tap feelings, and express himself in constructive ways is learning mental health skills.
In their book, Art: Basic For Young Children. Lila Lasky and Rose Mukerji describe four steps corn mon to the creative process. They provide us with a useful way to observe and understand self-expression in the preschool classroom as a whole.
| The creative process usually begins with a time of playing around and
exploring . . The next step is focusing. Of the many possibilities
sensed in the exploring phase, one is finally selected end pursued. To
focus means to commit oneself to a particular choice . . . Producing
is the easily recognized working stage during which the creator, using
whatever technical skills are required and available, carries out the project
. . . . The creator stops when satisfied with the solution to a
problem or expression or an idea. This fourth step, stopping, can
also be combined with evaluating or reworking."8
8Lasky, Lila and Rose Mukerji, Art: Basic for Young Children. Washington, D.C.: NAEYC, 1960. pp. 17-18. |
With this framework, we can become more aware of each child's creative approach to any area of the classroom. As you observe, notice when a child is exploring and when he moves on to focusing and producing. Discover the great variations in style and temperament. One child may move almost immediately from exploring to focusing, while another explores endlessly and is quite uninterested in producing. Yet, each child is experimenting, deciding, and expressing himself.
Think about how you, as an adult, express yourself - in the way you dress, wear your hair, decorate your living space, cook, garden, work, and play. With these examples of self-expression in mind, consider the creative potential of the various areas of your classroom. Do they set a tone or atmosphere which fosters the self-expression of children?
It is important to become comfortable with your role as
facilitator. Refrain from making judgments or involving yourself in a
child's task. Consider whether your questions or suggestions will change
a child's expressive intent. In a supportive atmosphere children will move,
dance, paint, build, sing, play, and laugh, each in an individual manner.
| Benefits:
Materials: Groundwork: |
Through painting, children can express feelings nonverbally and enjoy
creating color, shape, and line.
Paints, different-sized brushes, paper, easels, smocks or aprons, newspaper or a large sheet. Most of the time, painting for young children needs to be unstructured, spontaneous, simple, and available daily. This important self-expressive experience is sometimes neglected because teachers dislike the accompanying mess. Planning, regular routines, and parent volunteers to help may allow you to view the painting "mess" as a creative tool for mental health. These suggestions may help. Put an old sheet under the easels. It can be gathered up at the end of the day and washed periodically. Old shirts with cut-off sleeves make good smocks that children can readily slip on and off. Keep a roll of masking tape or a box of clothespins near the easel. An adult can easily tape paintings to a wall or hang them on a line. Two easels side-by-side create opportunities for experimentation with language, as well as art. Sometimes a reluctant child will paint with a friend. |
| The Experience: | Set out paper, paint, and brushes for use at the easels or a table.
Freedom of movement and experimentation are important to the process. Painting
allows for the unique expression of each child's feelings and ideas.
Encourage the children's natural interest by talking about their paintings. Open-ended statements or questions will not impose a structure or standard on the child. "Tell me about your painting." "How did you mix that purple?" Note interesting use of line or color. "I like those squiggly lines in the -corner." "1 feel cheerful when I see the yellow and pink you used." "Those lines and shapes make an exciting design." For other children, painting is a very private experience. They may ignore questions and comments and yet benefit from what they overhear. Also respect any reluctance to show or own a painting. |
| Reflections: | Be careful not to inhibit self-expression by having expectations for
finished "products" or making comparisons with other pictures.
Some Some children may want to tell you about their paintings. "Oh, it looks like feathers!" Write down their comments on another piece of paper or on their paintings. This can help adults understand and appreciate each child's work. Date the paintings. Over time you can see children's skills develop. |
| Variations: |
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| Benefits:
Materials:
Groundwork: |
Children begin to recognize feelings and empathize with characters
as a story develops.
A story whose main character moves quickly through a variety of situations.
We recommend Peter's Chair by Ezra Jack Keats, Harper and Row, 1967.
As you pre-read, note the variety of situations, small and large, that can be used to evoke the children's feeling responses. First try the experience with staff, aiming for a range of really colorful feeling -words and descriptions. Plan to use the experience with several smaller groups early in the year. With practice, the class as a whole eventually will be able to imagine how characters in a story "felt then." |
| The Experience: | Read the story aloud, making sure everyone can see the pictures. Then pick a situation in the story and ask the children to consider Peter's reactions. "Let's go back and look at Peter's tall building. How do you think Peter felt when he finished building it?" Listen and acknowledge their ideas. "Let's look at another page. Here the dog knocks the building down. How does Peter feel now?" Continue discussing situations for as long as you have the children's interest. |
| Reflections: | The question ". .. and how did you feel then?" can become a familiar
cope for children, not only in relation to stories, but for everyday events
in their lives. As children talk to you, ask how they feel whenever it
is appropriate. This question invites further conversation. It indicates
that you are listening, that feelings are normal, and that you are interested in their lives. Be careful not to overuse the question, and respect
children's privacy when they choose not to respond.
Peter's Chair is about a boy coping with the birth of a baby sister. This is a common event in the lives of many preschoolers. Discussing Peter's feelings will give these children an opportunity to have their own feelings acknowledged. |
| Variations: |
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| Benefits:
Groundwork: |
Role playing medical situations helps children cope with illness, doctor
visits, and accidents when they arise.
This experience requires a great deal of preparation, but is well worth it. Involve parents, children, local businesses, the news media, and the medical community as you imaginatively convert your center into a hospital! In one classroom the staff used blue hospital sheets on the walls to create the right atmosphere. With dividers and props, they designed a nurses station, blood bank, operating room, and patient rooms. Hospital gowns, ID bracelets, bandages, face masks, gloves, crutches, a wheelchair, shots (without needles), and medicine bottles were some of the items donated. One father built an ambulance out of a cardboard box and a siren was attached. The children brought materials from home and came dressed in white. The teachers and parent volunteers dressed as nurses, doctors, and ambulance attendants. Some non-medical activities were available for the few children who did not want to participate. As an introduction to the medical world, take a field trip to your local hospital, clinic, or doctor's office. Discussions after this visit will help build the children's understanding of medical terms and practices. Read a hospital story. Some children may want to share experiences they have had. Have an ambulance visit your center. As the children turn on the siren, see the stretcher, and listen to the attendant, their medical knowledge will grow. |
| The Experience: | You will probably need to begin your day with teacher-directed activity.
The following was effective in one center. The teacher calls the ambulance.
"We've got a man down on the ground on Maple Street. He fell out of a tree."
The ambulance, driven by a child, arrives. Teachers and children place
the man, being played by a child, on the stretcher and take him to the
hospital. In the operating room, the patient receives a shot for his pain
and bandages from a doctor (teacher) and nurse (child).
The children can gradually take over all of the roles, switching from doctor to patient to ambulance driver as more accidents occur. Allow them an unlimited supply of band-aids and turns with crutches, masks, and a wheelchair. Look for the child who is watching from the sidelines, perhaps not knowing how to enter the play. Create opportunities for him. "Would you help me with this stretcher, josh? We need one more person." "Would you give John a shot while I take his blood pressure?" Accept the feelings of the child who does not want to participate. |
| Reflections: | The unknown and often frightening world of the hospital can become
familiar to children as they dramatize real events with real props and
terminology. Be aware that some children in your classroom may have had
unpleasant medical experiences and will need special consideration.
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| Benefits: Groundwork: |
Red the Dragon's tantrums provide a structure for talking about angry
feelings and how to handle them constructively.
A day or so before you do this experience, briefly introduce Red to the children. If he's a puppet, Red can talk about himself and answer the children's questions. If he's to be an imaginary character, have the children consider how a dragon looks. In particular, "What kind of eyes does Red have? What about his nose, mouth, ears, skin, body, and tail?" One teacher did a large drawing on the wall in response to the children's comments. In either case, let the children know that Red has a problem and will be back to get their help in finding solutions. Talk about how enraged he gets and allow them to share some of their angry moments or memories. |
| The Experience: | Introduce the story with your puppet or pictures. The children will
be more involved if they have something to look at, as well as listen.
You might say, "Red has a problem. He gets angry all the time. He doesn't
know what to do with these feelings. Maybe you will have some ideas.'
Depending on the children's attention span, use one or more of the segments about Red. Read expressively. Let the children hear Red's feelings in your voice. Stamp your foot, or turn a plate upside down on the table. When you see an underline in the text, stop and collect responses from the children. Bring Red back periodically. Use him to discuss real situations that have made you or the children furious. When the children become familiar with Red, they may ask for him at appropriate times. |
| Reflections: | Although it is not always possible to understand or "solve" a child's
anger, simply acknowledging the feeling ("You seem angry.") is very important.
You are helping the child name and accept his feelings. The angry child
also needs help in learning appropriate ways of physically expressing his
anger. (Refer to DASH, MASH, SMASH.) Expression and acknowledgement often
defuse feelings.
If you sense that you have helped a child work through some angry feelings, you might want to go on to talk about "not feeling angry any longer." This, too, is a useful skill to practice. |
| Variations: |
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Once upon a time there was a young dragon named Red. He was called Red because he got angry so easily. When he was angry his face would turn bright red and fire would come out of his ears.
Red keeps getting into trouble because of his temper. In each situation, let's see if we can help him think of ways to get his angry feelings out without hurting anyone or anything.
You won't be surprised to hear that all of this tired Red out. He grumbled
but no fire came out of his ears. He was "fired out" too. Maybe your suggestions
will help him in the future. Let's invite him back to talk again.
| Benefits: Groundwork: |
Through imagination and observation, children learn that, even without
words, their bodies and faces communicate feelings.
At a quiet time, alone or with other staff, think about the unique face and body language you use with children each day. In what ways does your body respond When you feel joyful? How do you breathe, sit, stand, or walk when you're irritated? How do you hold your shoulders, hands, and mouth when you feel timid? Much of our communication is nonverbal. As we support mental health in young children, understanding this aspect of communication is essential. |
| The Experience: | Gather a small group for a game. Introduce the idea of "body language"
- how, if we look carefully, we can tell how someone feels without the
use of words. Choosing something obvious, pantomime an emotion and see
if the children can guess what it is. Then ask what things "told" them
how you were feeling?
Next, in a spirit of fun, suggest that they all give their bodies a chance to "talk." As a group, try to answer any of these questions. "How do you walk when you're cheerful?" "Show me a furious face." "What do your mouth or eyes or eyebrows do when you're lonely?" Finally, invite everyone to do their version of a joyous dance. Be sure to use a variety of feeling words. If you'd like to end on a quieter note, ask to see a group of sleepy bodies and faces. |
| Reflections: | Try this experience mid-year or later, when the children are comfortable with you. It may be difficult for young children. Work up to it by doing FACES SHOW FEELINGS and HOW DID HE FEEL THEN? first. Repeat it after a few weeks. Notice if the children are more sensitive to body language. |
These adult resource books may help you carry out the goals of the Feeling section:
Champlin, Connie and Nancy Renfro. Storytelling With Puppets. Chicago: American Library Association. 1985.
Cherry, Clare. Think of Something Quiet. Belmont, California: David S. Lake Publishers, 1981.
Juster, Diane and Linda Stein. Creative Arts for the Young Child with Special Lexington, Massachusetts: Commonwealth Mental Health Foundation. 1973.
Rogers, Fred. Mister Rogers Talks With Parents. New York: Berkley Books, 1983.
Zavitkovsky, Docia and Katherine Read Baker. Listen to the Children.
Washington, D.C.: National Association for the Education of Young Children,
1986.